Dosa and Family Time

When it came to choosing where to eat, I had a whole process based off the area. I knew which places had the most crowds, what dishes were the best in each place, menu price, the restaurants to avoid, the ones with great food at affordable prices.

When I would stay in an area for over a week, I got to know the staff and they got to know me, which I loved. Not everyone was super friendly at every place, but I had my spots and I had loved this one Uday's garden restaurant where I had the same thali two times, which people ordered....but the dosa was really number one.

I had this obsession with watching the food come out and then choosing what to order based off of people's food. Sometime I would ask them, but usually I would just take a secret photo to learn the menu.

While I was so disciplined in India, I really did not have dosa as a part of my diet because of all the oil. When you are eating outside the home, you really have to keep your eyes on the food visually because it can be really heavy, not fresh looking, or just not good period.

Overall, dosa was a safe choice and this was my day for BUTTER MASALA DOSA! Key word being: Butter

At my garden spot, The staff all recognized me because I went there a few times. He said, “South Indian meal?” and I said “NO”  

“Today is the day for dosa.” There were so many people eating it and I was craving it.  

He said, “No, no dosa today.”  

“Dosa master go home, he go sleep, no coming.” 

I said, “But just one more dosa please.”

I gave him the smile that makes it very difficult to say "No"and if someone does say "No" I am very disappointed like a child lol

He said, “Ok, ok another person make dosa for you."

And it was everything I wanted it to be and more-delicious! I can understand why people love dosa and why so many restaurants specialize in selling just dosa...yum!

While I was sitting there, I contacted my friends from the Tiffin shop. I had plans to go to their house to meet the kids and this ended up being a homecooked meal...what a food day!

On Her bike-it says “Jesus with her kids names Jacqueline and Stephan underneath.” She is so in love with her kids and so proud and grateful for her family. She verbally expresses it, but it is also written all over her face.  

She is beaming with happiness with the beautiful family that God gifted her…. 

We stop at the bakery and she asks me what I want, “Of Course, I say Nothing I am fine really.” She asks again so I just chose something very small.” She bought some cakes for the kids and me. So thoughtful, so sweet, and treating me not just like a guest, but like family.   

We arrived to her house and I was greeted by Jackelin and her grandmother and little James.  

Shanti says, “It is a very small home.” I said, “Don’t worry it is lovely.”  

The smaller the homes, the bigger the hearts 

Her husband went off on his bike to buy chicken. He wanted to make his famous Chicken biryani, but they both seemed so tired. They made some chicken curry, rice, and rasam(I love her rasam). It is with tomatoes, curry leaves, and some hot peppers-it is delicious. Everything she makes is good.  

They prepare the food at the table for me to eat like I am a queen. I said, “No please everyone eat together and both of them made a small plate of food.” He tells me to place the black and the green pieces of the side. One chili is too spicy, you don’t want to know.”  

It was great having Jacqueline there-primarily because she is the most adorable perfect child. She can also speak English perfectly and translate, which was great because her husband(Kumar) does much better with Tamil.   

He was trying to learn about my life in the US and how I grew up. I told him that my parents are split(divorced)and for him-divorce was just not something he could comprehend and did not understand the literal divorce process.  

He asked, “Did you grow up on your own or in a hostel.”  

I said, “No, my mother raised me.”  

But what did your father do, he did not give money?  

I said, “The child stays with one parent and then visits with the other. The parent that is not raising the child full time needs to pay child support. It is required by law. I made a mallot ruling like a judge would.  

He said again, “India married until death. No divorce, 10 percent or less.”  

Unfortunately I do not think that statistic is accurate anymore, but I will let him believe in love.  

The both had a love marriage and got married in 2009. Just 5 months ago, they quit their jobs and opened the hotel/restaurant. He says that this was a huge gamble, but they wanted to take the chance and wanted something of their own. They were still so in love 15 years later…They tell JQ that she should not focus on boys, but only focus on her studies.   

Jackie was just 13 years old, but so smart and wise for her years. She said that sometimes she does not get along with her mom because she gets blamed when her brother does something wrong. Her mother will scold her and this will make her feel upset.  I explained that I had that same exact experience when I was younger because I was the older sister. It was interesting to hear her say this because my father was exactly the same way, but in the worst ways/to the extreme.  

We spoke about languages-Telagu, Tamil, Malayaram, and Kannada being the languages of the South.  

They shared the Tamil bible with me and the English bible, which JQ said she regularly reads-good kids come from good people and good parents period.  

They pulled out all, allll, the 7 or 8 photo albums and told me all about their family background. JQ had this “Puberty Ceremony,” which is something new I learned. I did not know that India had this kind of ceremony. I thought it was a confirmation, but she said  “No.” Maybe she was not sure of the English term .  

There was the Puberty ceremony, the weddings, birthdays, holidays, and anniversaries. Shanti has 4 sisters and 1 brother and Kumar has so many family members, but they all live in the village in Tamil Nadu. They sat going back and forth about how many family members he has…Shanti said 100 and he said 1, 000. He  said that the one village is full of all his family members. One day, I will go with him and see for myself.   

The grandmother said that she would also take me to church on Sunday as I expressed my interest in going. Her house is exactly above Shanti’s with same layout, kitchen, small space, small room and bathroom. Shanti again said it is very small. I said we say in America that

“Home is where the heart is.” This is not a house….it is a home.”  

I could tell she was worried that it was a small space for me, but I tried to reassure her that it did not matter at all and I enjoyed myself.   

I mean talk about cultural exchange-wow.  

Thanks to Jacqueline we were really able to learn a lot more about one another and learn the differences we share.

I was playing outside with James and chasing him around. He was very shy hiding his face behind his parents most of the time, but in the end of my visit we were playing tag in the streets and he was smiling as bright as the sun.

What a nice day with people I can call my family and friends.